Powerful Passion

The other day I was walking out by the lake, listening to a  minister preach.   He spoke about Peter, His zeal without wisdom.  As I was listening and pondering… I heard someone yelling. I took off my headset and realized there was a fisherman in about about 20 feet from the shore, he was catching something and so excited about it. He was going on and on,  yelling and cussing with excitement  but I couldn’t see anyone in the boat with him. Then I realized he had someone on the speakerphone and it sounded like she was his wife.

I thought to myself… I bet Peter was like him.   He didn’t care what other people thought.

He was passionate.



David was sent…

When God calls you and anoints you, 
then you can be sure He WILL SEND YOU!
AND if HE sends you, then you can be sure
You WILL have the victory!!!!

It is amazing to me how Samuel was sent to anoint David, but Jesse had to send for him, because he was not even included in the 7 sons Jesse first presented to Samuel.

Then David was anointed King in front of his brothers, and “At that very moment the Spirit of God left Saul and in its place a black mood sent by God settled on him. He was terrified.” God sent an evil spirit…to torment Saul, then He sent David to play it away. David did not have to do anything. Saul sent messengers to Jesse requesting, “Send your son David to me, the one who tends the sheep.” Jesse took a donkey, loaded it with a couple of loaves of bread, a flask of wine, and a young goat, and sent his son David with it to Saul. David came to Saul and stood before him. Saul liked him immediately and made him his right-hand man. Saul sent word back to Jesse: “Thank you. David will stay here. He’s just the one I was looking for. I’m very impressed by him.”

But David continued to go back and forth from the sheep to the king.

The next scene, Goliath is tormenting the armies. Once again, David is sent. Jesse, David’s Father sends David to the front line with food and asks him to check on his brothers that are in the army. David makes sure his sheep will be cared for and God makes sure he is in the right place at the right time. When David gets there and hears Goliath mocking God, he asks about what will be done for the one that kills the giant. The brother accuses him of evil doing…but David wasn’t. He was serious. “What is it with you?” replied David (to his brother). “All I did was ask a question.” Ignoring his brother, he turned to someone else, asked the same question, and got the same answer as before. Then, again, David was sent, because the things David was saying were picked up and reported to Saul, so Saul sent for him.

David tells Saul he wants to kill the giant. Saul tries to discourage him, but David said, “I’ve been a shepherd, tending sheep for my father. Whenever a lion or bear came and took a lamb from the flock, I’d go after it, knock it down, and rescue the lamb. If it turned on me, I’d grab it by the throat, wring its neck, and kill it. Lion or bear, it made no difference—I killed it. And I’ll do the same to this Philistine pig who is taunting the troops of God-Alive. God, who delivered me from the teeth of the lion and the claws of the bear, will deliver me from this Philistine.”

So then, David is sent again when Saul said, “Go. And God help you!”

AND the next part just makes me want to SHOUT!!!!!!

Goliath mocks him, and David answered, “You come at me with sword and spear and battle-ax. I come at you in the name of God-of-the-Angel-Armies, the God of Israel’s troops, whom you curse and mock. This very day God is handing you over to me. I’m about to kill you, cut off your head, and serve up your body and the bodies of your Philistine buddies to the crows and coyotes. The whole earth will know that there’s an extraordinary God in Israel. And everyone gathered here will learn that God doesn’t save by means of sword or spear. The battle belongs to God—he’s handing you to us on a platter!”

That roused the Philistine, and he started toward David. David took off from the front line, running toward the Philistine. David reached into his pocket for a stone, slung it, and hit the Philistine hard in the forehead, embedding the stone deeply. The Philistine crashed, facedown in the dirt.


When God calls you, anoints you, then He will SEND YOU!  AND trust me, you WILL have the victory!

Three Crosses, Two Thieves, One Choice

There were two thieves beside Jesus as He died on the cross.

There were also two others, criminals led with Him to be put to death. And when they had come to the place called Calvary, there they crucified Him, and the criminals, one on the right hand and the other on the left. Then Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.”  And they divided His garments and cast lots. And the people stood looking on. But even the rulers with them sneered, saying, “He saved others; let Him save Himself if He is the Christ, the chosen of God.” The soldiers also mocked Him, coming and offering Him sour wine,  and saying, “If You are the King of the Jews, save Yourself.” And an inscription also was written over Him in letters of Greek, Latin, and Hebrew:


Then one of the criminals who were hanged blasphemed Him, saying, “If You are the Christ,save Yourself and us.” But the other, answering, rebuked him, saying, “Do you not even fear God, seeing you are under the same condemnation?  And we indeed justly, for we receive the due reward of our deeds; but this Man has done nothing wrong.”  Then he said to Jesus, “Lord,remember me when You come into Your kingdom.” And Jesus said to him, “Assuredly, I say to you, today you will be with Me in Paradise.”

The one thief defended Jesus to the other one who kept railing against Him, mockingly telling Jesus to save Himself… 
It’s interesting to me that when people are confronted with their sinfulness, they do one of two things they humble themselves and repent or they pridefully attack the one bringing the truth; looking for fault, deflecting the responsibility, or changing the subject…but…ultimately they are just harming themselves, because they’re missing an opportunity for change.   Humility is the threshold, repentance is the key that unlocks the door.

There were 2 thieves on crosses, beside Jesus as He died.  They had the exact same opportunity…but only one walked free with Jesus in paradise…while the other went straight to hell, still bound with his sin.

The thief that was repentant and said to Jesus, “Lord, remember me when You come in Your kingly glory!”

How precious…and like a cool refreshing drink of water that must have been to The Lord. This man’s belief in and defense of Him…saying “this man has done NOTHING wrong!” …when the crowds, soldiers and other man were still accusing, cursing and tormenting Him.

It was right afterwards that the earth trembled, it got dark…the temple veil tore and Jesus cried out, committing His spirit to God.

I wonder, what happened after that?

I can imagine seeing Jesus in the spirit, helping that repentant thief down off the cross, putting his arm around him, welcoming his new brother and friend into His kingdom…and then…arm in arm…side by side…they walked together right into paradise.   Jesus was always serving, loving, accepting, comforting and saving others…even in the last moments of his tortuous death.

All while the other thief was being led into utter darkness by demons, bound by his pride and inability to repent.  Still carrying his sin.

How did that humble thief end up on the cross beside Jesus?

Who knows why that man was a thief? Maybe he stole because he had a family to feed…There are “good” people, who do bad things and “bad” people who do good things.

But he had to have had some knowledge of the Messiah, he was surely humble enough to realize he was a sinner that needed saving, plus his heart was good enough to see and know who Jesus was…and knowing this made him courageous enough to defend Him.

It’s interesting to me, that he ended up beside Jesus, and watched Him…as he was tormented. He definitely had a front row seat, and fellowshipped in His sufferings, in a way that none of us ever will.

You have to wonder sometimes if it was the grace and mercy of God that allowed him to be put on that very cross…right then…right beside Jesus…Maybe he’d been offered the opportunity of salvation over and over again…but this time God made sure he would finally get saved?

There are choices in life.  Choose humility, choose repentance, and then choose Jesus!

Appointed Time of Liberty

This is a long testimony, but so amazing. I pray you will take the time to read it, and God will encourage you as you do. I am excited to celebrate this season of resurrection and share the promise He has given to all of us!

In early January, I went to Bethel, a church in Redding, California for the premier of Heidi and Rolland Baker’s documentary “Compelled By Love.” Part of me was afraid to go, because I have a weight problem. Beni Johnson, one of the Senior pastors there is so fit and into health, I imagined everyone there was in shape and I would stick out like a sore thumb. It has been such a source of shame in my life for over 25 years. When I got pregnant and was not married, I gained so much weight, even though that was also when I got saved.

So many things just fell away, drinking, drugs, other sins became unattractive, and I had no problem letting them go, but it seemed I began to use food as a comfort. I tried over the years to get it off of me, and could lose some, but then I would just gain it back again. So I decided, while I was at Bethel, I would go to their healing rooms and ask them to pray for this weight issue. I asked them to pray that God would show me the roots…or heal me…whatever, I just wanted to be free. When they prayed, I knew God had done something, because I was touched in the spirit as they prayed and wept. I also felt something release and leave me.

After I got home, nothing much changed, I was still eating emotionally and compulsively. So one day I was crying in the shower, praying, and I was saying to my body, “I am sorry I have not loved you. I am sorry I have abused you. I am sorry I let men abuse you. Please forgive me for not loving you.” When I got done praying, I heard the Lord say, “Contact Beni Johnson, she has keys for you.” I argued with the Lord and said, “What? I am just some random woman that lives on the east coast, she is a very busy woman, and she doesn’t even know me. I do not want to bother her.” So I just let it go.

Later that day, Beni posted her status on Facebook, and it came across my newsfeed. It was like she had written it just to me. “You need to look in the mirror and say, “Love wins here!” Stop abusing yourself, you are a work of art.” I was undone, and I took that as my confirmation that I had heard God correctly, and I WAS supposed to contact her. So with much fear and with many tears, I wrote to her. I poured out my heart. It was gut wrenching and painful, but, I was telling her my story.

Then, surprisingly, she wrote me back! She said I was “spot on!” and suggested a book for me, encouraged me to just take “baby steps.” She said that my weight was probably trauma weight. I thought, yes, maybe from being pregnant and not married, I could see that. The book elaborated on it and said it is usually rooted in fear.

I couple of days later while I was working, I met a naturopathic Dr. during one of my stops, he had a huge store full of natural health items, and spent some time talking with me about my weight issue, then later that night, I got food poisoning. I suddenly became very aware of my stomach. I was so sick and I could feel the poison all through my body, and God began to show me, in many ways, I had been poisoning myself with food. So, after that, my food choices began to change.

Then about one month later, I went to be with the Lord on a Monday morning, and He said…and this is scary to say, because what if I am wrong? What if I didn’t hear Him and I am just wanting something so badly I am making it up?
…but, I believe He said, it was my “appointed time to be set free” from my weight issues. He said…He had “heard my cries”…and “there is an appointed time in ME for liberty” and “TODAY” was my day. I wish I could say I jumped up down and praised Him, but I did not, I just listened and tried to hope.

So, He kept asking me if I believed Him, and said He could do what no man could do, not even me. He said I had to believe He had set me free. It required faith, and it would take me 6 months. While He was speaking to me, He also showed me a butterfly in a chrysalis. He was saying…that there is an appointed time for the butterfly to come out of the chrysalis, and I too, was about to get my wings.

He has always used the monarch to encourage me that one day I WOULD be free from my weight issues. I used to have a weight loss blog called “Becoming a Butterfly” and when I ran my first 5k, I iron-transferred a pink Monarch onto the back of a t-shirt to encourage myself. He also reminded me how I could not paint until He came and asked me to do it. Even though I already had everything I needed to be able to, I still could not put the pieces together, but once He had painted with me, then there was no stopping me. He said, it will be like that, it will be miraculous. He said when people asked me how I did it, He said, “Just tell them I set you free one morning.”

So, the next day, a spiritual mom wrote me and asked for my address, she said God had told her to send me something. I gave it to her and then I asked her,”I think God did something big for me, can I share it with you?” When I finished, she started laughing, she said, “THAT WAS GOD!!! Wait till you see. He dealt with me so strongly about sending this to you. It will confirm what He said to you.” She was amazed and I was curious. She also asked if the number 6 meant anything, and later I remembered God had said it will take me 6 months to get the weight completely off!


I got the present a couple days later, and in the box were 6 butterflies made of feathers, with glitter on their wings!!! There was no denying what God had said to me then. Maybe I could hope, after all.

A couple of months ago, I was invited to paint at a women’s conference, in Wilmington, NC, so I had been seeking Him about what to paint. Then hit me, I know what I will paint, I have to paint what He has told me He has done for me. To make it official, so, I went to look and see if it will work for the conference, and I discovered the conference was called “LIVE FREE!!!!”

THEN I had another huge revelation!! The conference was to be in the same city where I lived with and was abused by a man sexually, mentally and verbally before I was saved. He cheated on me with everyone, and called me fat all the time, even though I had a beautiful healthy body. He was truly sadistic and cruel towards me, and sadly, because I had no self esteem and was desperate to be loved, I just took it, and stayed with him. It seemed I would put up with anything to be loved.

It was right after I left him when I got pregnant, got saved, and gained all the weight. I realized…THAT was the REAL trauma, not the pregnancy. That man had cursed me, BUT God was telling me HE had just set free from it!!!!

Wow…so then I knew,

God was sending me back to that VERY same city where I was put under bondage, to paint at a women’s conference…
AND I was going to paint myself getting FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!

These are some of the scriptures He led me to during this time:
For the vision is yet for the appointed time, and it hurries toward the end, and won’t prove false. Though it takes time, wait for it; because it will surely come. It won’t delay.
Habakkuk 2:3

For everything there is
an appointed time,
and an appropriate time
for every activity on earth…
Ecclesiastes 3:1

God has made everything beautiful in its (appointed) time.
Ecclesiastes 3:11

He gave me some very simple baby steps, so I am starting. He said it will be different this time. People will be amazed, because the weight will just fall off. Sure enough, the weight has started coming off quickly and I have not even put all the steps into place yet, but I am working towards them!
I am excited, and still almost afraid to hope, but with all that has happened, it surely seems like Him.

How I was at Bethel church, and received prayer for this problem, then how God led me to Beni Johnson, my spiritual mom’s prophetic gifts, being asked to come to the VERY same city where satan had cursed me through that cruel man, and to top it all off…the conference being called LIVE FREE!!!! It just seemed too coincidental not to be God.

Once I got to the church there were more confirmations. The pastor’s wife got up and shared her testimony and she had been through abuse as I had, even more severely than me. I found out from one of her spiritual daughters that she loved butterflies, God uses them to encourage her. I had no idea, but what a joy to find out!

The last speaker, an Evangelist at the conference, came over to me after I shared about the meaning of the painting with the congregation, and she prophesied to me, it was so powerful and encouraging. She said I will be completely free and I WILL look like the woman in the painting!

So much of the conference was about becoming a new woman and even the mention of coming out of the cocoon, before I even painted the wings on the woman!

I hope when people see this painting, they’ll be encouraged to shed the old and become a new Creation in Him! To draw close to Him and seek Him with all their hearts! He hears and He cares!!!
Symbolism: The butterfly has long been a Christian symbol of resurrection, for it disappears into a chrysalis and appears dead, but emerges later far more beautiful and powerful than before.

As a symbol of Christ’s resurrection after three days in the grave, the butterfly is seen especially around Easter. But the butterfly is also a symbol of every Christian’s hope of resurrection from the dead.
Related Bible Verses

So will it be with the resurrection of the dead. The body that is sown is perishable, it is raised imperishable; it is sown in dishonor, it is raised in glory; it is sown in weakness, it is raised in power; it is sown a natural body, it is raised a spiritual body.
1 Corinthians 15:42-44

For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed.
1 Corinthians 15:52b

Remember the word you gave me.
Through it you gave me hope.
This is my comfort in my misery:
Your promise gave me a new life.
Psalm 119:49-50

Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature:
old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.
2 Corinthians 5:17

~ Resurrection: Resurrection body separates from the grave, or Earth, and rises into Heaven
~ Sanctification process: Separation from world, consecration to God (Acts 26:18)
~ Separation from the World: Orange is a separation barrier in the tabernacle. It corresponds to the wall of linen around the Tabernacle that symbolized separation from the world. Only the believer who is serious about the Christian Life will pay the price of leaving the world behind to follow the Lord Jesus Christ.

In Marriage: Forsaking all others (1 Cor 7:4)

has a lot of negative meanings…
but the good ones were
~ Health – Leviticus 13:37, Song of Solomon 1:5-6; 5:11
~ Humility

Wisdom in Waiting

tic tac clock
I was saved 25 years ago. Right after I was saved people began to tell me that I had an amazing call on my life. They would say all these wonderful things.  I loved it because I wanted God to use me so badly.

But, it would be many many years later before I was able to actually get up and speak in church.  That was wisdom and I’ve learned many things, by waiting on God:

You have to be healed before you can be used. Hurting people hurt people. You need that time for God to make you whole before He can send you.  For me, it took years and years. And I’m still going through healing…
Guess it never really stops.
The key to healing is humility. Don’t think you don’t need healing because I haven’t met one single person that didn’t.  I think about a pot or vessel with a tiny fissure…how it can crack under pressure. The vessel needs to be strong and whole to carry the glory.

Develop good character, with the fruit of the Spirit displaying in your life.  David after he was anointed king was chased by Saul and David had opportunity to kill Saul but he wouldn’t even touch him. David had the character of a King.  Do what you say you’re going to do. Be faithful when no one’s looking. Do things because it’s the right thing to do not to be seen by men.

Learn to weather the storms. Being in ministry is extremely testing. You have to be nice when you don’t feel like it. You have to be gracious to people who aren’t very gracious to you. Before God promotes you he will humble you. And for me…when he did, I just wanted to die, because it was that hard.  But you need to know how to rest in the storms and have faith to make it through the winter seasons.

You need time to study the word. You need the faith that comes from hearing the word. You need discernment because you become a bigger target. You should study to show yourself approved.  I go places now and I speak…often times I’m thinking I wish I knew the word better so I could just quote scriptures and their addresses.

You need times of testing to grow in your grace.  I love how David said he couldn’t wear Saul’s  armor because he hadn’t tested it. There’s a season of testing that which you were called to. I remember casting demons out of people in my kitchen or at work. I remember God having me stop and prophesy to people in the grocery store or walking at the park. I led so many people around me to Christ. I was even told if I said Jesus again at a job I would be fired. I quit that stupid job. I was doing what was in my hand to do but I wasn’t trying to overstep my bounds… Or my sphere of authority.  I also started painting after I was saved because I had a desire to do it even though I’ve never done it before in my life.  God would bring people to me and they would ask me to do commission paintings for them even though I never had any classes.

You have to learn to wear your armor.  When God would use me to do something miraculous, people would come against me like crazy. Especially the religious. In the 25 years God prepared me I learned not to let it hurt me.  I learned to not take it personally. To just see that it was the dark spiritual realm coming against me through people who had not been made clean.  Some of the worst attacks came through people that God had used me to deliver. I’ve had my hand bitten by so many people that I tried to love. But you just learn to pull the snake off your hand, wipe the dirt off your feet and move on.

When God did ask me to serve him, I cried and I argued with Him, because in the 25 years I went through so much heart ache… I really didn’t want to go through more pain.   People misjudge you, they compete with you, they attack you, they are rude, hateful…. They will suck the life and nice right out of you…

The biggest fear for me was I wouldn’t have enough love…. I constantly feel inadequate in this area.

So I’m just saying this to encourage you to wait on God to send you. Don’t be in a huge hurry. Do what’s in your hand to do.  Use your time of preparation to really get ready.

When God does promote someone around you…be encouraging to them. Don’t be a Saul to a David. Don’t take it personally that you were not chosen.   Don’t think that their promotion has anything to do with them… Instead look at yourself and see what ways you can improve as a servant of God.

If it was God then it wasn’t their choice, trust me.
if it wasn’t God they won’t have a healthy ministry and it won’t last anyway.

My Hope Deferred

When you wait as long as I have for a husband…trust me…you have gone through and experienced more emotions than most…
It can be quite the emotional roller coaster…
Up and down, in and out…yes or no…?

I get so many words about my husband and more advice than you can even imagine.  Let go and he’ll come, fall more in
love with Jesus, God won’t bring him until you are satisfied with Jesus…join dating sites, stop looking and he will find you, go out there and find him…date, don’t date…I could go on and on.    One person even told me his name and the exact day he would come.  Well, guess what?  He never did.  What was that person thinking?  They surely did not hear from God on that one.   I tell people, it is like you are always hoping for a real Christmas, but every morning you wake up and Christmas never comes.  You start being unable to hope anymore.  You think, maybe Christmas is for everyone else but me.

Some days I think…and people have actually told me…I will never marry.  Sometimes I agree and think God has told me to remain single…but then I have a dream where a man and I become one as Jesus touches us.  Other times I have so many encouraging me “hold on sister…he’s coming.”  Good things come to those who wait…really?

They say “if you have a desire to get married…then God will definitely bring you a husband!” Which I’m not sure I believe… Where does it say that in the Bible?  Many times God did not give people what they desired.  I had a desire to have more children and it didn’t happen.

So…they tell me things like he’s going to be a really good one.  A warrior/worshiper that doesn’t need armor.  He will be pure like me…others say he will be opposite.   Again…I could go on and on…lol.  I wish these words meant something…but honestly…they are just words at this point…lol.

I hardly ever talk about it publicly…because it is a great source of sadness as well as a huge disappointment in my life. It has also been one of those areas where I’ve been very vulnerable and so I’ve been hurt a lot by deceptive people.

I have seen all my siblings as well as my very own son get married before me.  I have relatives on their 2nd marriages and have seen many of their kids marry.

When I was younger, and a single mom…I used to sing at weddings and then I began to do wedding flowers for extra money.  Recently I photographed a friends wedding as a gift.  While all of these are a joy to witness…at the same time…each one hurt.  Oh how I longed to be chosen to be someone’s wife…and to have a father for my son…and more children…but the years went by…one by one…and he still has not come.

But on the other hand, there is a good side…because of my lack of companionship…
the Lord has truly become my Husband.  I am intimate with Him in ways that other women and men who are happily married may not have experienced.  So for that I’m very grateful.

So, I say all this to say…be careful what you say and “prophesy” to single people.  You might think you are helping…but…it is really not helpful if the word you give is NOT from God.  Hope deferred really CAN make the heart sick.

I have had a couple of single friends in my life who were waiting…for a very long time when one day suddenly God gave me a deep intercession for them.  Afterwards, I did tell them… “God just did something amazing for you and I believe you’re getting married.”  I knew it because of my intimacy with God…because I wept so intensely as I felt His heart for them, and their longing for a spouse.  And guess what?  Sure enough…they did…within months they met their mates! 🙂

In the 90’s I also had a singles’ Bible study for Christian women and our main purpose was to pray for our mates to come.  They all got married within a year or two…but not me…

I think possibly because the desire in me is so deep and I have waited so long, that God has given me a special grace to
pray for single Christians???  Honestly I don’t know…I’m not sure why He honors my prayer for singles but He doesn’t answer mine for a mate of my own.

But I do know that I understand how the Lord longs to be with us…because I long to be with my very own husband that way too… ❤

God’s Reasons to Prune Us

I studied Horticulture, and so I love the gardening analogies in the Bible. Lately I have been thinking about God’s Reasons to Prune Us.
They are so similar to pruning fruit trees.

Correct and incorrect pruning of an apple tree.

God Prunes to…

Increase Fruit Production

  • Some fruit trees produce blossoms and then fruit on spurs, which are bud-like outgrowths on branches. Pruning promotes the development of spurs that will bear fruit the next year. Young, vigorous trees may produce too many spurs, or poorly spaced spurs that you need to thin. This keeps the tree in balance. Balance is important in ministry too. We want zeal, but we need wisdom and caution too.

To Open Us Up

  • Trees need full sun and wind…and people need the fullness of the Son and the wind of the Holy Spirit blowing in their lives.
  • Close-set branches need to be pruned to open up the tree. This creates good air circulation within the tree, which helps prevent diseases.
  • Vigorous trees often produce branches that are too close together or even cross each other, and a tree can actually shade itself too much…actually blocking the sun. The sun is important to keep a tree healthy and free from mold. It also helps ripen the fruits, increasing the red color in red apples. Which makes them more healthy. We have to keep ourselves open to God too. We can’t crowd our lives with activities and not spend time open before God. Sometimes God has to cut things from our lives so we will seek Him!

To Strengthen

  • Crops that are too heavy can break limbs, especially on dwarf trees.
  • Pruning helps keep a tree from getting overwhelmed and having limbs break.
  • This is the same in our lives. We have to be careful to have good boundaries and know what we can or can’t carry in life.  Jesus’ burden is light and His yoke is easy.

To Help with Harvest

  • Trees properly pruned are much easier to manage at harvest time, and there is less chance of damage.
  • Unity creates a power and ease for harvest time!

To Remove Hindrances or Distractions

  • Pruning bearing trees is critical to maintain healthy fruiting wood. Remove weak, “shaded-out” wood, diseased or dead wood, watersprouts and root suckers.   These parts actually take away from the branches that are producing the fruit…
  • Sometimes there are relationships or activities that have to be removed from our life because they are blocking God…they will actually keep us from getting all we can from Him.

To Prepare for a Season of Growth

  • There’s a season that is best for pruning too, it is usually best done in late winter or early spring, while the trees are still dormant. Sometimes God will take you through a season where you have to be very still, and before you come out of the season, or right as you’re beginning to blossom, He will begin to cut things from your life. The word says, humility comes before honor.
  • With a young tree, it is best to trim them during summer. Probably because a young tree hasn’t known the winter season yet, that’s more for the seasoned Saints. Pruning for a young minister is more to get them established.

To Shape

  • Maintaining the proper shape is important for fruitfulness, health, growth, strength and ease of harvest. Older trees are well established and their pruning is more for maintenance and asthetics.

To Renew and Re-establish

  • Pruning older trees invigorates them. Older barren can often be brought back into fruitfulness simply by pruning them to encourage new growth.

To Keep Healthy, or for Healing and Cleansing

  • Damage may occur from harvesting or harsh winter weather, like ice and heavy snow. Check the bark for small holes and signs of insect infestation. Rodents often chew small branches and bark, so prune these branches. We need to keep watch of our spiritual health. Sometimes ministry can be hard on us, we get wounded or hurt. We need to make sure we deal with the pain as soon as possible.
  • See that no bitter root springs up…

To Establish

  • First year tree whips are small and unbranched, usually about 12 to 18 inches tall. They have to be pruned right after their planted in summer when the lateral buds have grown into small leafy branches about 3 to 4 inches long. An upright branch had to be chosen to become the central vertical leader, and allow selected lateral branches to continue to grow from the leader as scaffold branches for the mature tree. This early pruning helps determine the ultimate shape of the tree.
  • Pruning a new ministry right away is like training up a child in the way he should go…it establishes a strong a central vertical leader or a rod in us!  

Confident and Obedient


I don’t think Joseph was prideful. I think he was confident and obedient, I really don’t like it when people accuse and judge him like that. They don’t know his heart, and no where in the bible does it say he was prideful. It is curious to me when people think that…wonder why they would?I think he KNEW he was loved, because he was Rachel’s…who was his dad’s favorite wife. She was the wife his father had worked so hard and long for…the one Jacob wanted all along, not the one he was tricked into marrying. Rachel was the wife that was barren for so long, and prayed and prayed to God for a baby. I think Joseph was a manifestation of all those prayers, so he was blessed by God. I think because of that, he was favored by Jacob…and hated by his brothers. His brothers who had a mother that was never loved by Jacob.
I believe Joseph was a good boy, and that is why God chose to speak to him through dreams…and to ultimately use him to rescue his whole family. I think He was created with that purpose in mind, and God was just showing him his destiny so that he would not faint when he was judged, hated, mistreated, sold into slavery, rejected, lied about, imprisoned, put in chains, and hurt by those that should have loved him.
Joseph was confident.  Confidence is not arrogance or pride, it is trusting God loves you, no matter what, and therefore you are willing to be vulnerable, and share your dream, especially because God gave it to you!  Confidence is willing to be vulnerable and love even those that would reject, or hurt you. Vulnerable to love and serve others.Pride is trusting in ourselves, guarding and hiding.  Self protecting.I think Joseph WAS obedient, and HE KNEW he was supposed to share that dream.  I believe God planned it that way, because then, when all was said and done…
His brothers and father would KNOW it was ALL GOD’s will and doing…because He loved them. this is from the movie about Joseph…and I just love it…it is one of my very favorite songs…

God can turn any life around in an instant! Choose Wisely!


Rahab the harlot was an Amorite gentile who put her life on the line and betrayed her own country to help hide and harbor 2 spies. She hid them on her roof under heaps of drying flax, and let them down to the ground with a cord. She then told them to hide in the mountains for three days and she put the scarlet cord out the window as they had told her to. She also made them promise to bless and save her and her family, once they were free. 

I am guessing in addition to working at the family Inn and being a prostitute, she also made fabrics from the flax she was drying, and maybe even the scarlet cord she put out the window. The red cord that would notify the soldiers when they attacked her city, that she was a believer; just like with the blood, painted on the doorposts, they would pass over her household.

Later she married one of those spies, Salmon, who was a Prince in the house of Judah. She went from being a heathen to a lady married to a leader in the community. She also gave birth (or was the ancestor of someone who did) to Boaz who married Ruth. 

Ruth was another gentile woman that gave her life to help someone besides herself; her mother in law, Naomi, a believer in God, 

Both women were Jesus’ ancestors and rewarded with good husbands…salvation and a redeemed life for their unselfishness towards God’s people.

Rahab is the only other woman mentioned in the Hebrew hall of faith, besides Sarah.

Choose this day who you will serve and bless!!!

Peace I give you!

Yesterday, I prayed for a woman that had been suffering with fibromyalgia. I wanted to encourage her to pray through some things that might’ve caused it. Sometimes it’s related to unforgiveness towards a father or husband that did not or won’t provide for his family.

As we spoke she mentioned that she was abused by a family member. She had never had any healing or deliverance from it…so with her permission, I asked if there were any parts in her that wanted to talk…and sure enough, there was a seven-year-old. She began remembering a really traumatic moment with the abusive man. Jesus came and ministered to her as we prayed through the trauma. 

Afterwords I asked her if there was any place for the 7yr old, where darkness was still around and she said there was a closet. She didn’t want to open the door so Jesus did for her and inside there was a scary skeleton of an animal. 

She told me she had been to 60 different schools as a child and never could have friends and the one cat she did have that was her one “friend”…someone in her neighborhood shot and then her dad had to put down. 

It was as though this skeleton represented her inability to have or keep friends. It was a lie. I heard the Lord tell me to encourage this seven-year-old part of her to prophesy to that skeleton to come back to life like in Ezekiel when he prophesied to the dry bones. So she did and when she did it actually became a dog that she loved even more than the cat!!!! She had not even thought of him! She laughed with joy!! And I marveled at the goodness of God! 

When we were done praying Jesus looked at her and said He gave her peace and it was a gift. I thought that was interesting and wasn’t really sure why He had said that.

Later that night I was looking at the root causes of fibromyalgia and I found a website that said the antidote for it was……..peace!

God is amazing! I can’t wait to see how this woman’s life is going to be different from this point forward!!

Oh yes…I also want to say, I got permission from the woman to share this…and she said she is feeling much better today and hopeful for her complete healing! 

Give ME a Drink

A while ago, the Lord spoke to me about the women at the well.  I wrote about it here.

But this was the essence of it:  You have looked to men to try and satisfy your thirst, but IF you just drink from ME, you will not thirst again.  You are hungry, but your food is to do the will of the Father.  If you take this sparkling coat, and choose to be my Bride, wear it for me daughter, I will put living waters inside of you that will heal many and I will use you for my glory.  Don’t be disappointed, trust me.

In December, I was setting up the night before I was to minister, and on the way home, God began speaking to me again about the woman at the well.  He was saying that the reason He asked HER for a drink when He met her, was because she had always been a taker.  He said, after she met Him, she became a giver.  I knew that word was for me.

The next day before I spoke, a friend came and wanted to introduce me.  He is a prophet.  He said he had a word from God for me.  He told everyone that I had suffered so much in my life, I had dug a well in the Lord.  He said but God had also dug a well in me.  He said that he saw my mouth wide open, God was pouring Himself in me and out of my belly was flowing living waters.  He said, many just go…but others are sent from God.  He said I was a true “sent one.”  I wept.  He did not know what God had said to me the night before.

I just got back from a trip to Bethel, in Redding.  When I was there, I noticed, many of the people I spoke to were being touched by the Holy Spirit.  Some of them were physically reacting, others were crying.  It was visible.  I on the other hand, was not really feeling anything.  It made me curious, so I asked God…what was going on.  I was worried…  He said, “remember, I made you into a giver now…you are no longer a taker.”  Wow…

He is so good how He confirms things to us.  I am excited about all the drinks I will be giving.  I want Him to pour Himself into and out of me!!!  I pray He uses me to heal, set free, deliver and save many by His Spirit and for His glory!  In Jesus’ Name!!!

Prophetic or not?

Saturday soapbox, sorry, I’m about to step on some “prophetic” toes.
(sorry, unedited, but wanted to just put it out here.  I will fix it later.)

So come on, let’s leave the preschool fingerpainting exercises on Christ and get on with the grand work of art. Grow up in Christ. Hebrews 6:1 MSG

Dr. Bill Hamon defines prophecy as:

…simply God communicating His thoughts and intents to mankind. When a true prophecy is given, the Holy Spirit inspires someone to communicate God’s pure and exact words to the individual or group for whom they are intended. It is delivered without any additions or subtractions by the one prophesying, including any applications or interpretations suggested by the one speaking. To be most effective, it must also be delivered in God’s timing and with the proper spirit or attitude.

Prov 30:5-6 says: Every word of God is flawless; He is a shield to those who take refuge in Him. Do not add to His words, or He will rebuke you and prove you a liar.

The gift of prophecy edifies, exhorts, and comforts (I Corinthians 14:3); there is no mention of the word prediction here. It helps us build up or strengthen; and should lead us to the Word of God. It is the ministry of the Holy Spirit to convict of sin, of righteousness, and of judgment to come (John 16:8-11).

Prophecy is divinely inspired and anointed utterance; a supernatural proclamation in a known language. It is the manifestation of the Spirit of God – not of intellect (I Corinthians 12:7), and it may be possessed and operated by all who have the infilling of the Holy Spirit (I Corinthians 14:31)

Intellect, faith, and will are operative in this gift, but its exercise is not intellectually based. It is calling forth words from the Spirit of God. The gift of prophecy operates when there is high worship (I Samuel 10:5-6), when others prophets are present (I Samuel 10:9-10), and when hands are laid on you by ministers (Acts 19:1-6).

The word prophecy means to “bubble up, to flow forth, or to cause to drop like rain.”

To prophesy means to be able to communicate with God, to hear Him speak, or see something, like a dream or vision, and then share what he gave you, so that other people can know the will of God.

So when you claim to be prophesying then you better be saying something God told you to.
It should also be clear so others can understand it.

So, if you’re not doing that…then you are not being prophetic, right?  You might be a teacher, inspiring, or a worshiper…but you are not prophetic.

If someone is claiming to be prophetic, then they should ONLY speak what they hear God saying.  I prophesy to a lot of people and I can tell the moment, I step out of what God is saying and I have to backtrack and strike that word.  I see, hear, smell, know and feel things in the spirit…all by the Spirit of God and all from God.  Not by my imagination, not what I want to say, and not without purpose.

God is direct, when He speaks, it always has a purpose.  The word God sends forth will accomplish what God is sending it forth to do.

Prophesying is for edification, building others up, giving direction, confirmation…etc.  Sometimes it is for exposing secret motives of the heart, so that things can be torn down and rebuilt.  It can be a word of wisdom or knowledge, a dream or a vision, but It always lines up with scripture and leads people to it.  It should also glorify Jesus, not the giver…or their gift.

Prophesying should be concise, it is like shooting an arrow, or cutting with a knife, so you can’t just throw words out there without careful precision.  It is dangerous and reckless.  Not to mention dishonoring to God.  Sometimes words are sent to guide someone into their right position in Christ, to direct them where they need to go (Acts 13:1-3).  You must get the “directions” from God, not your soul.  You MUST not be a blind guide, you must have eyes to see, to help others know the way.

The Bible tells us that we are to “Despise not prophesying, because it is important in the church.

It brings life, like it did to the valley of dry bones (Ezekiel 37:1-4).  It gives spiritual vision, which brings hope. The Bible says, “Where there is no vision, the people perish.’ (Proverbs 29:13,18).  It edifies, exhorts, and comforts (I Corinthians 14:3) and brings revival and restoration (Acts 2:16-18).  It also can guide you to your right position in Christ go (Acts 13:1-3).

Prophesy should be judged.  We are called to “Prove all things.” I Thessalonians 5:20-21. When a prophecy is given, we are to test it and hold on to what is good in it.

Seven Ways to Judge Prophecy

1) Judge them by their fruits (Matthew 7:16-18,20).

2) Who does it glorify?  The person giving the word, another person, or Jesus?  (John 16:14; I Corinthians 12:3; I John 4:1-2)

3) Does it line up with Scriptures? (Isaiah 8:20)

4) Does it come true? (Deuteronomy 18:22) Some prophecies are not of God even though they may come to pass. The benchmark remains that all prophecies should exalt the Lord Jesus.

5) Is the word direct and concise, or disjointed or confused? True prophecy is line upon line and precept upon precept (Isaiah 28:13).

6) Does it release people into liberty, or put them into bondage? (Romans 8:15)

7) Does it bear witness with your spirit? (I John 2:20,27)

In the light of this, what is prophetic art then?

1) It should come from God.  Therefore, the person that painted it should be able to tell you how God gave it to them, what they heard or saw, and EXACTLY what He was saying.  Some people think they can just step into a calling and say “I’m a prophetic artist” when God never called them.  When they cannot even hear or see anything in the spirit.  They should not say, “what is the Spirit saying to you?”  That is also not biblical.  The prophet bore the responsibility of declaring the word EXACTLY how God gave it to them.  It was not up to, nor should it be open for another’s interpretation.  That is not God.  If I just handed somebody a prophetic portrait that was nothing but swirls and colors, and asked them what they thought it meant, that would be contrary to the Word of God.
For no prophecy was ever produced by the will of man, but men spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit.

2) It should say something.  The work should be done with excellence, and skill, painted in a way that people can interpret what is being said.  Some of the art that is being done and being labeled as prophetic art is nothing but abstract art.  Honestly, it makes no sense.  It’s without form, it’s without a voice, it is just a bunch of colors and swirls and different shapes. That is not prophetic art, that is immaturity. If you stood up in church and spoke in tongues, claiming to speak for God, but you did not interpret it, or no one else did, then you are out of order.  That is not biblical.  God says if you are going to prophesy, people should know what God said through you.  If you’re called to do prophetic art you’re going to say something with your art, and you will know it came straight from God because it’s going to be Him speaking through you and you illustrating what He showed you.  God doesn’t send forth his word without purpose; that is not the way God works.  (Isaiah 28:13)   I cannot give someone a word in tongues and say…be blessed.  No, I have to make it clear if I am going to give someone a word, what I hear God saying.  For the person or congregation to receive the word, it must be interpreted.   Art is no different.
3) It must be concise.  It should be concise and plain.  Deut 12:32 says: See that you do all I command you; do not add to it or take away from it.  Rev 22 ends with a strong warning against adding to or subtracting from that prophetic word. Rev 22:18-19 says “Warn everyone who hears the words of the prophecy of this book: If anyone adds anything to them, God will add to him the plagues described in this book. And if anyone takes words away from this book of prophecy, God will take away from him his share in the tree of life and in the holy city, which are described in this book.”

From these scriptures, we see that God is serious here. He insists that we accurately represent Him when we speak for Him (or prophesy). The delivery of a prophetic word is not the place to exercise our creative skills (2 Peter 1:20). Instead, prophecy is the place to clearly and accurately reflect what God wants to communicate (2 Peter 1:21).

If I have a word for someone, I will speak it very clearly, and if it’s a vision, I share the vision to the best of my ability.  I think sometimes we have to be careful when we see visions, trying to interpret it, when all were supposed to do is share the vision.  And the person will know it’s God because it will mean something to them.  When I give someone a prophetic portrait I can tell them exactly what I saw and what I believe God is saying but then I’m always open to hear what they believe God is saying.  I tell them what I saw first though, sometimes I don’t even know the meaning of what I’m seeing even though I know, that I know, what I’ve seen…sometimes they know exactly what it means, when I do not.  I am just the messenger.  God is the one speaking.
4) It should have a purpose.
When a prophetic word comes forth, it should have a definite purpose.  When a good pastor prepares a sermon, he studies, and seeks God, and then he develops a message that teaches, encourages, edifies…etc.  He doesn’t just get up and talk about random topics that do not mean a thing.  That would be confusion.  God is a God of order, not chaos.  It would not serve a purpose.

Prophetic art vs Worship art
Someone can be a worship leader in music, and never get one prophetic song.  A prophetic song is a song where you hear it in the spirit and sing what you heard.  A worshiper is just as anointed…and just as precious…and ministers too…but just in a different way.  One is not better than the other.

Not being a prophetic artist is nothing to be ashamed of…it just carries a responsibility with it.  One type of artist is not better than the other…but there are clearly outlined rules for something to be called “prophetic” in the bible.   If you are someone that is called to prophesy, I think you will agree with this.  Because, if you are going to call yourself a “prophetic” artist, then your art should be saying something others can understand, and it better come from God…not from you…otherwise…it should just be called worship art…

By claiming to be a prophetic artist, you are saying…God gave me this, and told me to paint it.  If there is no clear word from your art, then that is not God speaking.  True prophecy is line upon line and precept upon precept.

When I was first being invited to come and paint for conference I would pray before I went. I would seek God with all my heart, ask him what he wanted to “speak,” through my painting, at the conference…and I would get a word usually in the form of a vision.  Sometimes it’s just a direction by God, but I usually know before I get to the meeting, exactly what I’m painting.  Now it comes more naturally for me, the Lord has told me to paint what is in my heart.  I follow my peace.

Just like if I was called to just prophesy verbally to a church, I would seek God before I got there and I would have an idea of what I was to speak.  Now maybe when I started to speak, it may expound, because God may add to it, but God will always give you that seed to start you.

When I do spontaneous prophetic portraits, with someone sitting there, I have no idea what I’m going to paint, just like if I’m getting a personal prophetic word…a lot of times I don’t know until I begin to just pray and then I will hear God speak.

But if I don’t get anything from God there’s nothing I can do…if I say, this is from God, when it isn’t…then that is being a false prophet.

One thing about the prophetic, is this is important to remember is this. The FINAL purposes of God are always positive, not negative.  Sometimes those that are prophetic are called to deal with sin and weakness so that it can be replaced with what is right, true, effective and positive.  Just like this message, it might be necessary to “root out” and to “pull down”; but the final purpose is always to “plant”. Some of thing we are we are doing, we may need “destroy” and “throw down,” but the final purpose and plan of that is to “build”, and to build well!

Cast One Line, Catch One Fish, and the Temple Fee is Paid in Full

The Coin from the Fish’s Mouth by Otto Elliger

When they arrived at Capernaum, the temple tax men came to Peter outside of his house, and asked, “Does your teacher pay the temple taxes?”

Peter said, “Of course.”

But as soon as they were in the house, Jesus confronted him. “Simon, what do you think? When a king levies taxes, who pays—his children or his subjects?”

Peter answered, “His subjects.”

Jesus said, “Then the children get off free, right?  But so we don’t upset them needlessly, go down to the lake, cast a hook, and pull in the first fish that bites. Open its mouth and you’ll find a coin. Take it and give it to the tax men. It will be enough for both of us.”

What an amazing story.  Jesus heard Peter talking to the men, even though He was in the house.  He knew Peter had defended Him, but He used this as an opportunity to confront, encourage, and teach Peter.

Jesus was saying, “I don’t have to pay a temple tax because I am the Son of God, and neither do you Peter, because you are too.  We are children of the King.  Therefore, we are above the law, superior to it, but we will be subject to it, and obedient to it, because we do not want to offend those still living by it.  We are free, but we will be bound, as not to be an offense.”

Peter had been fishing all his life from the very place Jesus sent him to go and catch the fish.  Jesus had told Peter, when He called him, He would make him a fisher of men.  Don’t you think Peter was thinking hard, standing on that shore, preparing to throw in the line?  Jesus said, cast your line, not a net.  Isn’t that interesting?  Only one line that would hold only one fish, not a net that would hold many fish…just one line, and one hook, and one cast.  And miraculously, on the VERY first attempt, Jesus promised him that he would catch a fish, and not just any fish, no, it would be THE EXACT fish…that would have enough money, in his mouth, to pay taxes for both of them.

Jesus could have just made the money appear in Peter’s hand, or his pocket.  He could have just taken the money out of their treasury, but for some reason it was important for Jesus to TELL Peter to “fish” for it.   To trust Jesus and do what He said and for him to cast that one line.

Jesus was proving, He was the Son of God, and ruled over creation, but He had left His heavenly throne and come to earth, to live as a man, to save others.  He was saying, I have power, and I am ultimately in control, but I will play along with the rules of this lower place, so not to cause another to stumble.

I think maybe the fish represented Jesus, He was the Word, and the word came from Jesus’ mouth, to Peter, like gold.  “And the words of the LORD are flawless, like silver purified in a crucible, like gold refined seven times.”  Psalm 12:6

Jesus was saying He has paid the penalty for all of us.  It is as simple as just casting that one line, and it will surely bring up, the ONE fish that has everything that you will need in his mouth to pay everything you owe, every penalty, every tax.  Jesus is the fish, or the one man in the sea of humanity, that had the ability to make us free from the penalty of sin and death.  To pay the temple what we owe.  Jesus was teaching Peter how to be an evangelist, by showing him Who He was.

“Does your teacher pay the temple taxes?”
You have no idea what you are asking…of course He does, actually, He will pay the penalty for us all!

Oh yes, Peter, I will make you a fisher of men.

The “Write” Direction


People are asking about the book I just wrote…so I want to share a little testimony.

Several years ago, the Lord asked me to start writing books. He told me first through many people…prophetic people. People that were my friends, and other people that you would probably know if I said their name. One of them said, “your books will be greater than your paintings.” I kept arguing with God…and fought it…I did not know what I could write that anyone would want to read. A lady actually prophesied to me one day…”God is trying to bless you, stop shrinking back!” Then one of my spiritual dads came to me and told me I am supposed to write my life story. I am still fighting that one…it just seems self centered to me, and I wonder…”WHO would buy it anyways?” …lol.

Since then, a gold angel came to me in a meeting and gave me a spear. I had never seen an angel…and I did not want to tell people when I did see him because I do not want to be a weird Christian that is more focused on their experiences than on God. I also did not want to be deceived…but after the angel came, God told me he was an angel of revelation and he would help me write the books He was giving me. Then He confirmed it…over and over.

One night I went on a date, with someone I should not have been going out with. But, honestly, I was mad. I was mad at God that I have been single all my life, and I have waited for Him to give me a husband…I have been celibate for 20 yrs…and yet, God will not bring me a husband…so sometimes I get frustrated and do stupid things. Not to worry, I was still pure and appropriate with this man, but I just had NO business being with him. It was not God’s will for me to date him, and I knew it. Because he was not my equal in many ways…

So the man asked me to prophesy to him…and hesitantly I agreed because I was not feeling particularly spiritual…but when I did…I heard God clearly, and started prophesying so harshly. NOT like me at all. God was rebuking this man so strongly, saying things like “what are you doing?” I kept apologizing. At the end, I saw a spear hit a bulls-eye and I heard God say, “don’t be afraid YOU WILL HIT the mark.” After I finished prophesying, I fell down…I could not stand the HOLY Spirit was on me so strong. So I knew it was of God.

The next day I went to be with God, because honestly, because of my anger, I had been having a hard time wanting to hear what He had to say, so I had been avoiding Him. So when I did…He started speaking the word back to me. I realized, God was rebuking me for not writing the books and for being out with this man. The spear I saw, was what He was giving me to say through the books. Then, He gave me Isaiah 55:11…”so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.”

I wept…and I had to call the man and apologize and tell him that I had given him a word that was for me. I was broken.

Not too long after, I just started this book…it is NOT actually one of THE books I feel I am called to write…but for me, it is a start…and I needed to do something to breakthrough and get myself going in the “write” direction.

I saw a movie by Nicholas Sparks and I went and read his story…I was amazed to hear that he got 1 million for his first book.  That got me excited.  Later I was watching a ministry meeting streaming and they were praying for healing for people, but then this one man got up and said, there is someone you are asking God about money, and He is saying all the money you need is attached to one act of obedience.

Recently I was watching a TV show, and they interviewed a famous Christian author.  They were asking him how he started, etc.  He said a couple of things that really ministered to me.  He said that he realized people would get saved reading his books.  Everywhere he goes, people tell him they god saved from his books.  The books also opened doors for him, doors all over the world, with famous people.  He also said he realized he needed a publisher.  He tried to do it on his own, but learned quickly he needed

It was after that, I felt an unction to get the first book done 🙂


My Personal Breakthrough

Last year, around this time, I was at a conference and I had a booth there to sell prints of my art. During the meetings, I was working on a painting in my booth. The painting was called, “Breakthrough.” No one knew, except those I told, because I would just hide it when the people were in the vendor area.

At this conference, I kept getting words that God was “promoting” me. I remember saying to one of them, in the prophetic room, “oh…that just means I am going lower.” If pride comes before a fall…humbling comes before a promotion. Someone gave me a book, after that, and when I opened it, I saw the title of a chapter, “Testing Comes before Promotion.” I knew God was speaking to me.

One of the days of the conference, a fellow vendor gave me a box…she said she had made it a while ago, but felt led to give it to me. When I opened it, I was surprised to find a handmade hammered bracelet with the word “Breakthrough” on it. It was confirmation for me. I told her about the painting and she was encouraged, but she said, “I feel like you are going to have your own personal breakthrough too.”

Last year, I went through such a sifting, I wondered if I would survive it. It came in two waves, the first was horrible…it started right after that conference, I literaly just begged God to let me go home. But, I finally came out of it in February or so. I was so happy, and started painting like crazy…but then the Lord told me in April “a fire was coming” and not to be afraid of it…it was Him, it would take me deeper and higher. He was not kidding…the fire came. It brought with it…such a despair. Such hopelessness.

But I did get free, one day in my quiet time, and after it left, a couple of weeks later, I woke up and smelled a fire, a wood fire with meat on it in my bedroom. It left, but was still in my arms and hands… I knew God was speaking to me. He was purifying my ministry. A couple of days later, I went to spend time with the Lord, and felt led to read my journal, and I came across the “fire” entry, that I had forgotten all about…lol.

I asked a sister to pray for me, before the despair had lifted, and she ended up calling. Her pastor and husband were there, and they all prayed for me. The pastor kept talking to me about doors that were going to open for me. And the keys of David. I did not know what that meant, but did some research. After that, I heard God speak to me, “It will cost you everything.” I did not know what He was speaking about, so He gave me a vision. In the vision He said He wanted to give me the keys to Heaven, but they would cost me everything.   ( read about it here: https://christinecouncilblog.wordpress.com/2013/07/21/keys-to-the-kingdom/ )

And sure enough, after the despair left, I started getting doors opening to me, from so many, to come and speak. I have never been a speaker before in my life…but I was being asked to do it. Then I was invited to go across the USA, and my trip was paid for. Something that has also never happened before. And then recently, I was invited to be on an internationally aired TV show.

So, I found the box from my “Breakthrough” bracelet the other day, and saw that there was a business card in it. When I took it out, I realized she had put a scripture on it, along with the word “Breakthrough.” I have been busy working on my own jewelry, and I just had the thought to look the scripture up…and to my surprise, it is the same thing Jesus spoke to me recently, when I had that vision of Him.
Coincidence? I don’t think so…

And just now, when I went to find the photo to add, turns out it was taken the EXACT same date last year. 10/6/12 So that means that is when she gave it to me too.

This was the scripture.
Matt 16:19 I will give you the keys of the Kingdom of heaven; what you prohibit on earth will be prohibited in heaven, and what you permit on earth will be permitted in heaven.”

Honor One Another

ok, I have a bit of a rant in me…forgive me…whilst I step onto my soap box for a bit…….

I despise it when I see people pick ministers apart. I have heard people IN THE CHURCH bad mouth Joel Osteen, Benny Hinn, Paula White, T. D. Jakes, Rick Joyner, Joyce Meyer, Ken Hagin…and many, many, many, others.

Even heard pastors badmouth other denominations…from the pulpit.

…and I confess, I have been guilty of being critical at times myself

I wonder, how can we be like that? Why would we be like that? What good will it do? When Jesus taught us a house divided will fall? How dysfunctional is that?

It releases a fear of judgement that prevents people from stepping into ministry. I know I was SCARED when God called me. I cried because I feared the judgement I knew would come against me if I began to be “seen.”

Sure, there may be things they do not do perfectly…and we all make mistakes…Lord knows…I DO!!!!!

But, can’t God handle it? Does He know how to chasten them? Does He not raise up and pull down? Doesn’t Jesus say to Pilate, “You would have no power over me if it were not given to you from above.” How much more so in the church?

When I look at Joel Osteen, I just love him. I love his smile, and positive gentle way. I love that he is carrying on his Father’s legacy…so faithfully. I don’t see how anyone could say something mean about him…

To me, it says MORE about the PERSON being critical, than it does about Joel.

I remember running from the parking lot into Joyce Meyer’s meetings in the 90′s, when she was first starting her ministry: I wanted to get the best seat I could…because the anointing was stronger than anything I had ever felt in a meeting. I even got my gift of tongues there, and one time she actually stopped to speak to my friend and I…then got up and told everyone how we had encouraged her.

How could anyone say anything about a woman that has truly laid down her life to feed so many people?

The other day, I was talking ugly about a minister…I still don’t agree with what they do, but then I realized, the minister I was talking about was precious to that person I was speaking to.

I ALSO realized, these leaders…they are our PARENTS in the Lord.

God says, we are to HONOR them, so we will live a long life…and it will go well with us in the land God is giving us. Dishonor brings dishonor…

When I was little…people always picked on my sister, and when they did, I would beat them up. She was my sister!!!! And I hated them talking about her like that!!!! I would fight for her HONOR. When my son was little, if someone said something evil about my him, I would not agree with it. I would defend him. He was my family…so I had his back. To me, it did not matter in that moment if what they said was right or not. I wanted my son to know I was standing with him. To me, that is what HONOR does.

The bible says:
Brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

I would add…we need to talk about “such things” too. Let no unwholesome speech come from our mouths.

When you are a child, you learn, “if you can’t say anything nice, then don’t say anything at all!” I would add to that…just pray, pray to your Father in Heaven in secret. Pray for those parents to be brought to repentance if you think they are wrong…OR for YOU to be…because it just might be YOU and not them that needs to repent! Jus’ saying….

Ok…I am stepping off now…

Be tried and true, and authentically YOU!

This morning I was thinking about David and Saul.   How Saul offered David his armor, but David said no.   He replied, “I have not proved them.”   David knew that even though Saul’s armor was amazing, since he was King, it would be the best; and although it could possibly protect him, he ALSO knew it wasn’t made for him.   He did not “know” it…so it just wasn’t “him.”  But the sling HE had proven those nights in the fields, protecting the sheep, yes, he knew what he could do with that simple slingshot and just one smooth stone.   Because God had taught him.

David could have cared more about his reputation and just said yes to please the King, but he had the courage to say no to him, and to be true to himself.  David knew who he was in God.  He had a relationship with Him that was tried and true, just like he did with the sling shot.  David was authentic.

What God has called others to do, He simply may not have called you or me to do. It’s easy to copy another, and try to be like them, because we want what they have or we want favor with people.  But, that is not God’s way…and it will never satisfy the longings of your heart.

One time in the spirit, Jesus and I were walking on the beach and there were shells as far as I could see. They were piled up on the shoreline like they do sometimes.  Jesus picked one up and held it in the palm of His hand. He looked into my eyes and said,
“There is not another shell like this one…anywhere. They are all different. Everyone.”

So simple, yet so profound. How much more are we like that to Him?

Everyone is called to pray; but few may be called to a life of continuous prayer like John Welch.   All are called to trust God’s provision; but, we may not be led to “prove” the LORD by giving away everything we have and going to rescue orphans, like Rolland and Heidi Baker.   We are all called to have faith, but none of us may walk on water like Peter did.

Sometimes I see artists take classes from another artist, and when they are done, their art looks just like the art teacher’s work. Oh how that grieves me!!!! They have lost their artistic “voice” by becoming like someone else.  Why do they do that, and more importantly, why would a teacher want them to do that?   I have also I heard people start to talk like the person they are studying under…or musicians that sound like the latest “superstar” on the radio.

It is a HUGE GIGANTIC ENORMOUS pet peeve of mine!!!   I want to be so original, so authentic, so true, so VERY ME…because it is THEN and ONLY then, that I am in MY sweet spot.  That spot where I totally get why God made me.  Yes…then I find my divine purpose.  And I am living IN it.

I think David knew that one day he would be King. I believe God must have told him when he was under those starry skies, watching over those sheep, worshiping the One that made them.  I also think he was a man of honor, because he was so dishonored by his family. When David hurt, he ran to God, where he worshiped and sang to the Lord, yes, he honored Him. That was how he encouraged himself in the Lord. Then God showed David honor because God honors those that honor Him. I also think David could not stand that giant dishonoring his God, because he truly knew the cruelty of it…AND He knew his God; His God was a God of honor.  David was intimate with the KING…and he loved the Creator so much, he was willing to fight and defend His Honor!

Honor yourself, and honor others.  Don’t mimic them, or try to be like them.  A person that values originality will NOT like being copied by you. Those that are looking to dominate you or build a following…will.

Be who you were created to be.  And if you don’t know…then run to God when you are hurting and in that secret place, with your Creator, you will become who you were created to be.   You will then be like David.  You will know what has been proved, and what works for you.  And you will become a giant slayer. A leader. A person after God’s own heart. Someone God will be able to use.  You will be the true you.

Know God and know yourself.   Be tried and true, and authentically YOU!

Delight yourself in Him, and He WILL give you the desires of your heart.


“You don’t know your worth.”

This sculpture, Walking Man, or L’Homme qui marche, is the most expensive piece of art to ever sell at auction, want to know it’s price?  $104.3 million.  Tell me, do you think it is it worth that?

I am an artist, so I love original art, and I certainly don’t.  But, someone did.

The other day I was with the Lord, and I was asking Him why I always do this one very foolish thing that causes me to get hurt over and over again.  This is something I have been doing all my life it seems.  God just said to me, “you don’t know your worth.”

I have been thinking about that, since He said it to me.  What does that mean?   What is my worth?  And how can I know it?

As a child, I grew up not loving myself.  The family I came from did not know how words could wound a young child, especially someone sensitive like me, so I began to hate myself at a very young age.  The curses spoken over me became part of me.  Deep inside I did not believe I was worth much.  I remember saying many times. “I hate myself.”

Recently, the Lord set me free from the lie, and now, I am extremely sensitive to anyone that makes me feel bad about myself.  It is amazing how different I feel now.  But, I guess, even though I now love myself, coming to know your worth, is something I have to realize, comprehend and learn to walk in.

What makes something of value, or worthy?

Cost.   They cost a lot.  The sculpture above was bought with a price, a very high price.  Once something gets a price in an auction, its worth is established.  I was too, when Jesus died for me.  God must have thought I was very valuable to send His only begotten Son to die for me.  You know the old saying, “you get what you pay for.”

Rare.  Valuable things are rare.  Hard to find Antiques, or historical artifacts are so precious because time has taken so much from us.  They give us a glimpse into the past.  They have been preserved.  God says He looks to and fro for someone to bless; someone with a heart after His, He says they are rare.

Purpose.  If something does something that only it can do, then it is worth a lot to the person that needs it to accomplish what it was made for.  There are tools that have been created and designed by the medical field that keep people alive, to the patient receiving it, it is priceless.  God said He made us with a purpose in mind.  Maybe we are the only ones that can fulfill that purpose.

Unique.    I was thinking, I am too, there is NOT another person like me on this earth. No one has the same fingerprint, or face.  I am a true original.  The Mona Lisa is priceless, but I can get a cheap copy for hardly anything.

Personal.  Some of the trinkets I value most are those that are very personal to me.  Gifts given to me by those I love, or mementos from special occasions.  Those things cannot be recreated, or replaced.  The memories they carry with them are too precious.  God says we are like that to Him, that He knew us before He created us.  That He has our name written on the palm of his hand.  He knows how many hairs we have on our heads, and his good thoughts toward us are more than the stars.  Wow.  That is pretty personal.

Trustworthy.  There are many things and people in my life that have come and gone.  But that one thing that remains and is always there for me becomes very valuable to me.  That one trusted friend is like pure gold.  Tried and true.

Precious.  Gold, diamonds, and rare gems are precious.  They have to be sought out, mined for, and panned for.  They can’t be found just anywhere.  People lose their lives for these things because the potential of reward is so great.

Love.  My family, dear friends and pets are some of the things that are the very most valuable.  We love them, and they have loved us.  God calls me His daughter, and He has loved me more than anyone ever has.

Now that I have meditated on it, I can see I have great worth.  Not because I am all that…but because I am His.

He chose me, He knows me intimately, He bought me for a great price,  He died for me, He calls me family, He sought me out, He loves me, He created me unique with a purpose and there is only one of me!!!!!

That is so amazing isn’t it?!!!!    I have worth!!!!!  And if you are His, you do too!

Hold On

Listen to Jesus…
and have faith…
He said you ARE
going to the other side,
and remember…
He is with you!

Sometimes God will speak to you about a promotion, or give you a promise, and usually, after that, a storm will come. Promotion always means you are going to go through a season of testing. Just like Joseph had the dream, shared it and then was sold into slavery. The word, then had to try or test him.

I believe the Lord gives you the promise so you have something to hold onto in the storm, and the fire…so that you will make it to the other side. Refined and ready for promotion.

Jesus said to His disciples, let’s go to the other side, so they got in the boat and then Jesus went to sleep. A storm came, the boat was being swamped, and they were in real danger. So they woke Him up saying, “Master, Master, we’re going to drown!” So, He got up and rebuked the wind and the raging waters; the storm subsided, and all was calm. “Where is your faith?” he asked his disciples. In fear and amazement they asked one another, “Who is this? He commands even the winds and the water, and they obey him.”

Beautiful Feet

They tried to stop Him, and they nailed His feet and hands down. Could they still smell the costly perfume the woman had anointed Him with as they pounded the nails into his feet?

So now, we are called to be His FEET and HANDS…to GO and SERVE.

What He overcame, He has given us authority to do. Will you go? Will you serve?

Luke 7:37-38 And behold, a woman of the city, who was a sinner, when she learned that he was reclining at table in the Pharisee’s house, brought an alabaster flask of ointment, and standing behind him at his feet, weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears and wiped them with the hair of her head and kissed his feet and anointed them with the ointment.

John 13:5
After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him.

John 13:14
Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet.

Matthew 28:8-10
The women, deep in wonder and full of joy, lost no time in leaving the tomb. They ran to tell the disciples. Then Jesus met them, stopping them in their tracks. “Good morning!” he said. They fell to their knees, embraced his feet, and worshiped him. Jesus said, “You’re holding on to me for dear life! Don’t be frightened like that. Go tell my brothers that they are to go to Galilee, and that I’ll meet them there.”

Romans 10:15
And how can anyone preach unless they are sent? As it is written: “How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!”

Acts 14:10
“Stand up on your feet!” At that, the man jumped up and began to walk.

Isaiah 52:7
How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him who brings good news, who publishes peace, who brings good news of happiness, who publishes salvation, who says to Zion, “Your God reigns.”