Letting go…

opened my hand
a flower blooming
Each finger a petal
I’m letting go

Felt the white ribbon 
slide and slither
slowly around and 
through my fingers
Like a snake in the grass

The Red Balloon lifted 
higher and higher
Until the final moment
when it slipped completely 
from my hand

parting ways 
like ex-lovers 
with one final 
passionate kiss
Released.

Finally free,dancing, with the wind
Rocking back-and-forth,
a buoy in deep waters, 
caressed by waves.

I watched as it diminished,
until faded away
from an inconspicuous dot 
to complete nothingness

Swallowed up by 
the enormous blue sky
It disappeared.

Then, a tear fell 
from my eye
As my lips mouthed 
a somber 
“goodbye”.

Freedom isn’t really free.

Freedom isn’t really free. 

You want to be free? 

Then you have to fight for it, contend for it, work for it. 

I minister to a lot of people, and sometimes they SAY they want to be free. But, when I start to pray I can see, they are not really ready. They are actually afraid to be free. 

I tell those I minister to, you have to fight for your freedom. You have to fight for your sanity. No one is going to fight the fight for you. Not even Jesus. He already did what He had to do, the rest is on you!

Even when God gave the land to people, even after Joshua marched around the city and the walls came down, they still had to go in, take out the evil ones and occupy it!

It is true that Jesus came to set the captives free, but there’s a door you have to be willing to walk through to get there. You also have to be willing to fight for it, because the bible says you must work out your salvation with fear and trembling. It won’t come without a price. You will have to die to your flesh to live in the spirit.

You also will have to believe, that in the storms you can still walk on water. You must decide and have faith to pick up your mat and walk. 

You WILL have to work for it.

AND yes, it will cost you, but it is only then, that you will truly be set free. And only then you will have LIFE…
and have it more abundantly…

FLY!!!!!!!!!!!!

you can be
wimpy or a warrior,
a victim or victorious,
a hero or a zero,
living or dead,
sitting or soaring,
pitiful or powerful,
a slave or free…

THESE ARE YOUR CHOICES TO MAKE…
and to act upon…
Ain’t no body gonna do it for you…
not even JESUS…
TELL ME THIS DAY,
WHAT WILL YOU CHOOSE,
Life or Death?

You only GET ONE LIFE…so live it!

I double dog dare ya!!!!

You need to be the HERO in your own life…
BUT you WILL have to fight for it!!! Stop praying for a miracle and BE THAT MIRACLE!!!
You want to help others? Then help yourself first!!!

David fought hard before he was KING.
Joseph worked his way out of that pit, before he could save all those other people!!

The only thing between you and your dreams is action!

Pick up your mat and WALK!
Take off those grave clothes!!!

Let it be done to you according to YOUR faith. Jesus already GAVE you all the POWER you need when He sent Holy Spirit!!!!

See it, believe it, do it!

FLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If I can see it, then I can do it
If I just believe it, there’s nothing to it
I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Spread my wings and fly away
I believe I can soar
I see me running through that open door
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly

Defeating Rejection with Dance!

11/29/2011

 

Over the holidays I had a couple of things happen with family members where I felt rejected, my heart broke and I wept, so I went to be with the Lord to ask Him about it.  I have learned that pain will pile on and hurt us deeper when there are unhealed roots.   He started reminding me of all the people that have rejected me all through my life.  Family, friends, co-workers, boyfriends, employers, teachers, church members…and even myself.  There was so much pain there.

So the Lord had me write a list of all those that had rejected me to go through and forgive each one.  It was intense and hurt to remember them all, but when I was done, there was a huge release.   I also asked for forgiveness for any way I had rejected others.  I learned along the way that rejection has stages, first we are rejected, then we reject others, we also begin to fear rejection, then we reject ourselves, and the final stage is creating rejection around ourselves.  Being a seer, when I get around people, a lot of times I can feel their issues.  I feel rejection as a deep pain in a person’s heart and have seen the Lord remove a huge knife with the word rejection on it, as He set them free.  When the rejection gets to the final stage I can tell, because I will have a strong desire to reject them, push them away, avoid them…and I will have to work hard to love and accept them…that is where the warfare of Love comes in.

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Tonight as I was thinking about it all, I remembered a heavenly experience God had given me.   In the vision, I was young, and out in a field with a group of girls, we were holding hands in a circle and dancing around…freely laughing, playing, and full of joy!   Then, for a moment I “looked” into their eyes to see if they “liked” me, and the young girl that was showing me around saw my heart and said to me, “It is ok, you are alright, there is no REJECTION here.”   This was profound to me.

All my life it seems I have been looking into other’s eyes to “see” if I was ok, but it was never their place to determine that for me.  God was reminding me, I am a citizen of Heaven, and where I come from, there is no rejection.  We are called to be like Him and He accepts us all, so rejecting others is actually a sin.  It is a tool of the enemy to cause us to be wounded, to divide us, to shut us down and shut us up.

When a person begins to reject others, that is when you will see the judging, critical spirit in them…you can almost feel them sizing you up.   They will also be very striving, performing, still trying to earn a position that God created them for. Religious spirits are like this too.  Jealousy and envy are in their hearts.  They will create cliques, factions, and walk as though they are better than others, creating an atmosphere of spiritual elitism and idolatry.   I believe this division is one of the greatest hindrances to the Lord moving and all of it has to die for Love and Acceptance to reign so we can be in unity as His body.

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When I first started going to my home church, I would see people dancing together, loving one another.  I was afraid to step into the river.  I was not used to that type of freedom and acceptance, but now, I do not hesitate.  So, when I go to a different church to paint or minister, during worship, a lot of times I will invite others to dance in a circle with me…as the spirit flows on and through us…just like at my home church and just like I did in Heaven.  It is a time where HIS glory comes and we laugh and giggle just like we did in my heavenly vision.  Anyone can join us, and I constantly invite others to come into the circle.   The Lord comes on us so strongly as I do this, sometimes I will be unable to continue to stand, so I will fall out in the spirit and His GLORY will rest on me heavily as I lay there on the floor, laughing completely drunk in His Love.  A woman that I had danced with in a series of meetings recently came to me the last night I was there and said to me, “you bring so much love when you are here, and you make everyone feel so accepted.”

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YESSSS, thank you Lord for revealing this and allowing this woman to encourage me!!!!  That is my heart for the church, (and even those outside of the church)…that is what I feel called to release…because I know, dancing like a child with others is warfare and an intercession of LOVE created to defeat rejection, to release liberty from the Kingdom of Heaven and bring unity to the body!!!!

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No Longer Stuck in the Muck

09/15/2011

Yesterday I was at the Lake taking photos.  The water level is way down and has left parts of the lake bed exposed. There was one part of the shore that used to cut into the woods, but now was dry.  As I started to cross it,  I saw there were footprints that had sunken into the clay.I decided to take my chances.  I had on flip flops and as I started to cross, my feet began to sink too.  They went inches into the mud.  It was like wet clay, and I could not pull my sandals back out, they actually came apart.  I had to reach down and pull them with my hands.  It was very unstable, and hard to walk on, I thought I might fall, with no traction, nothing solid to push against. Even though my shoes were off, I kept walking clumsily and finally made it to the other side.  The mud squishing between my toes.

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My sandals and feet were now covered with this clay.  It was so sticky and thick and as I walked, I picked up more dirt.  I tried to wash it at the waters edge, but it was hard to do.  I needed a good powerful stream to get it off.This situation made me think of 2 scriptures:

King James Bible

He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings.   Psalm 40:2

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But it is happened unto them according to the true proverb, The dog is turned to his own vomit again; and the sow that was washed to her wallowing in the mire. 2 Peter 2:22The first scripture made me think about how we, when we were in sin, we could not escape ourselves.  It was like this slimy mud had a hold on us.  We needed someone’s help to get us out.  Then we needed a ground we could stand on so we could walk the right way.  Praise God that Jesus did this for us!!!  He came and rescued us.  Then I thought about the second scripture…how, although we have been washed, will sometimes slip, or willfully sin, and when we do, it is so much like getting stuck in this unstable mud and having to be cleansed all over again.  How foolish and ungrateful would that be?

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When I got home, I got my garden hose out and put it on high pressure, I washed my sandals and feet and praised God that He has washed me and I am clean.  I no longer have to fear the miry clay, that I will be stuck in it, as long as I am mindful of where I walk, as long as I walk on solid ground.   When I was done, I walked on my stepping stones where my feet stayed clean, and my step was steady and sure.

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Been singing this song all week, so I as was writing this, it just came into my heart!My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus’ blood and righteousness.
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly trust in Jesus’ Name.

Refrain
On Christ the solid Rock I stand,
All other ground is sinking sand;
All other ground is sinking sand.
When darkness seems to hide His face,
I rest on His unchanging grace.
In every high and stormy gale,
My anchor holds within the veil.

Refrain
His oath, His covenant, His blood,
Support me in the whelming flood.
When all around my soul gives way,
He then is all my Hope and Stay.

Refrain
When He shall come with trumpet sound,
Oh may I then in Him be found.
Dressed in His righteousness alone,
Faultless to stand before the throne.

Words: Ed­ward Mote, cir­ca 1834; first ap­peared in Mote’s Hymns of Praise, 1836.

Music: Sol­id Rock, Will­iam B. Brad­bu­ry

Free to Fly

 06/19/2011

Lightning bugs are so amazing, I just painted, Children of Light, so they have been on my heart.  Not too long ago, the Lord really spoke to me through them, they seemed to be everywhere this year.   I asked Him why He created them, praising Him for His artistry and He told me as Christians we are like them:

• We GLOW because we carry His light in dark places.
• We are a wonder to the world, especially when we move by the Spirit, because it is supernatural.
• They use their light to attract others so they can reproduce, and we are called to use His light to make disciples too.
• We have to be like a child to enter the kingdom of heaven…and Fireflies bring out the child in us…and make us smile.  How many of us have memories of running around with a jar at dusk collecting them with our brothers and sisters?  Or going to sleep with a jar of them on our bedside table.

Jesus said, “For a brief time still, the light is among you. Walk by the light you have so darkness doesn’t destroy you. If you walk in darkness, you don’t know where you’re going. As you have the light, believe in the light. Then the light will be within you, and shining through your lives. You’ll be children of light.” ~ John 12:35

One night I was in my kitchen, and I saw a lightning bug caught in a spider’s web outside my window.  I was in a hurry, but had the thought I should go outside and help him get free, but forgot all about it as I got busy.  The next day I was washing dishes, when I saw the lightning bug again, but this time, he was not moving, he was completely dead.  The Lord started speaking to me, He told me that this little firefly’s light would never shine again.  I cried, I identified with it because I was struggling with something myself that felt like a spiderweb and I feared it would render me useless for the Lord.  We, as Christians can so easily get entangled in webs and traps that are set for us.

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It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. ~ Gal 5:1

The situation was a person God had told me to stay away from, because the relationship was not healthy, but I was having a hard time letting them go.  One night they came to see me, and after their visit, we opened the front door, and there was a huge perfect spider web going completely across the threshold.  The Lord spoke to me, He said, this relationship is like a spider web in your life, if you continue to spend time with them, you will end up like that firefly.  I got my camera, and took pictures of the web.   Later, when I went to edit them, I could see this person getting in their car through the photo.  Again the Lord spoke, if you decide to remain friends with them, you are choosing to go through the web to get to them.As I resisted being with them, the presence of God was becoming stronger and stronger in my life.  One night I was on the computer, the sun had set, but I had not yet turned on the lights in my house.  I was chatting online, telling someone how God was blessing me, and that I had finally closed the door on this relationship.    As I did, a light kept catching my eye in my dark house as I was typing on my computer, but I did not pay much attention to it.  Eventually I could not ignore it, because it had come right in front of me.  I couldn’t believe it, but it was a Lightning Bug!!!  In my HOUSE!  How did that happen?  The Lord, again spoke and said to me, “Look at how it is glowing and flying, isn’t it beautiful?”  Yes…it was, and I praised HIM for setting me free!

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Ok, I wrote this in the morning and later that night around 11:30pm I decided to run to the store.  I was in a hurry because I know the store closes at midnight.    As I went out my front door I walked right through a spider web. It was across my threshold, the exact same place as the one I had seen before.I noticed the spider building his web earlier when I went on my front porch for something, and thought that I should probably knock it down, but figured I wouldn’t be going anywhere until morning, and it would probably be gone by then.  So when I left I had forgotten all about it, and walked right through it, but of course THEN I remembered seeing it earlier.As I was pulling the webs off…and getting the heebie jeebies wondering if there was a spider on me…a firefly came right up and flew all around me.  I thought it was so odd that this would happen, and even stranger how compelled I felt to go to the grocery store right then.

So I contemplated on my drive to the store and then again on the way home.  When I walked up my front steps, I looked for the remnants of the web and I saw the spider was still there.  I was relieved that he wasn’t on me, but sad when I looked closer and realized he had a firefly in what was left of his web.   The spider was right beside him and it looked like he was biting the firefly, the little bugs light was blinking so fast like he was putting out a distress signal.  This time I took the time to loose him, although I feared it was too late.

I came in and started asking the Lord what He is trying to show me.  I think He was saying He wants us to be diligent to watch for the webs…and remember when and where we have seen them.  If the thought comes to you to knock it down, then do it, right then, so when you are busy, you won’t forget it is there and walk right into it.  If you see another believer caught in a web, then go to them and help them get free, don’t wait until later because it might be too late.

OK…this is CRAZY…but as soon a I finished writing this, for some reason, I went out to check on the lightning bug and to my surprise, he was crawling around.  I helped him onto my hand and immediately he started FLYING!!!  He hung out for a really long time in front of me, just hovering, weaving in and out of the columns on my porch, across the threshold, like he was thanking me for saving him.    I watched with tears as he took off, given a second chance to fly…his light glowing in the darkness.

John 1:3
Everything was created through him; nothing—not one thing!— came into being without him. What came into existence was Life, and the Life was Light to live by. The Life-Light blazed out of the darkness; the darkness couldn’t put it out.