People are asking about the book I just wrote…so I want to share a little testimony.
Several years ago, the Lord asked me to start writing books. He told me first through many people…prophetic people. People that were my friends, and other people that you would probably know if I said their name. One of them said, “your books will be greater than your paintings.” I kept arguing with God…and fought it…I did not know what I could write that anyone would want to read. A lady actually prophesied to me one day…”God is trying to bless you, stop shrinking back!” Then one of my spiritual dads came to me and told me I am supposed to write my life story. I am still fighting that one…it just seems self centered to me, and I wonder…”WHO would buy it anyways?” …lol.
Since then, a gold angel came to me in a meeting and gave me a spear. I had never seen an angel…and I did not want to tell people when I did see him because I do not want to be a weird Christian that is more focused on their experiences than on God. I also did not want to be deceived…but after the angel came, God told me he was an angel of revelation and he would help me write the books He was giving me. Then He confirmed it…over and over.
One night I went on a date, with someone I should not have been going out with. But, honestly, I was mad. I was mad at God that I have been single all my life, and I have waited for Him to give me a husband…I have been celibate for 20 yrs…and yet, God will not bring me a husband…so sometimes I get frustrated and do stupid things. Not to worry, I was still pure and appropriate with this man, but I just had NO business being with him. It was not God’s will for me to date him, and I knew it. Because he was not my equal in many ways…
So the man asked me to prophesy to him…and hesitantly I agreed because I was not feeling particularly spiritual…but when I did…I heard God clearly, and started prophesying so harshly. NOT like me at all. God was rebuking this man so strongly, saying things like “what are you doing?” I kept apologizing. At the end, I saw a spear hit a bulls-eye and I heard God say, “don’t be afraid YOU WILL HIT the mark.” After I finished prophesying, I fell down…I could not stand the HOLY Spirit was on me so strong. So I knew it was of God.
The next day I went to be with God, because honestly, because of my anger, I had been having a hard time wanting to hear what He had to say, so I had been avoiding Him. So when I did…He started speaking the word back to me. I realized, God was rebuking me for not writing the books and for being out with this man. The spear I saw, was what He was giving me to say through the books. Then, He gave me Isaiah 55:11…”so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.”
I wept…and I had to call the man and apologize and tell him that I had given him a word that was for me. I was broken.
Not too long after, I just started this book…it is NOT actually one of THE books I feel I am called to write…but for me, it is a start…and I needed to do something to breakthrough and get myself going in the “write” direction.
I saw a movie by Nicholas Sparks and I went and read his story…I was amazed to hear that he got 1 million for his first book. That got me excited. Later I was watching a ministry meeting streaming and they were praying for healing for people, but then this one man got up and said, there is someone you are asking God about money, and He is saying all the money you need is attached to one act of obedience.
Recently I was watching a TV show, and they interviewed a famous Christian author. They were asking him how he started, etc. He said a couple of things that really ministered to me. He said that he realized people would get saved reading his books. Everywhere he goes, people tell him they god saved from his books. The books also opened doors for him, doors all over the world, with famous people. He also said he realized he needed a publisher. He tried to do it on his own, but learned quickly he needed
It was after that, I felt an unction to get the first book done 🙂